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You know, I find that a lot of people don’t really know themselves.
A good example is a lot of girls think they’re not superficial yet
have to have an expensive wedding ring. Don’t worry, Folks,
it’s just an example. I tend to think I know myself and in
turn, know why I wouldn’t make a good rock star. Here's the
list of at least 10 reasons:
 1.
I'm pretty boring
If I ever made the tabloids, it would be: “Mr Koval was spotted in
the grocery store the other day, buying a case of Coke and chips – 2
of the 4 Cs”. Not very exciting.
2. I don’t have any
addictions.
I haven’t had to “battle any demons” or check myself in anywhere.
I still have the same unopened bottle of Vodka at my place from the
day I moved in. I don’t do coke or heroine. I’m pretty
uninteresting.
3. Smokes.
Lately, smoking is unfashionable. That’s all it’s turned into
anymore – a fashion. But I like to enjoy the centuries old
tradition of smoking tobacco. I don’t think they’d publish my
picture anywhere because usually it has a smoke in it.
4. I don’t do
Pop songs.
I’m not a pop band like Nickleback or Bon Jovi. I don’t sound
like I’m taking a shit when I do my vocals, nor do I rip off anyone
that sounds familiar.
5. I do my own
hair.
My haircut is so middle-of-the-road that no one cares....except the
fine folks at Alberto.
6. I don’t have
a manager.
I think having a manager might get me more gigs and promote stuff.
It's always been out-of-pocket but my pockets aren't that big.
7. I’m not sure
if anyone’s heard my songs.
I guess that's the main one.
8. Too funny
Not that I'm rip-roaring hilarious or anything but I find I have to
explain why I said something, and then I usually say, "Never mind,
it was funnier 2 minutes ago."
9. Facial hair
At the time of writing, I'm growing my beard back. Beards
aren't fashionable; I don't think they ever were.
10. No desire
It's true. The only thing I'm shooting for is to make a
comfortable living just playing and making songs. All the best
stuff is done when no one's paying attention.
So there's at least
10 reasons why I'll never be mega-rock star. I'm sure there's
more but today's the 1st and I have to get this up on the site.
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