 For
Valentine’s Day, it’s a day to spend loving moments with your Main
Squeeze. But sometimes things don’t work out and that’s OK. On a
good note, here’s some red flags to watch out for when you start
dating that Special Someone.
- She likes to
fart;
- She can
out-drink you;
- She sleeps with
other guys …while you’re still home;
- She’s on a first
name basis with the Monday morning staff at the Clinic;
- She’s into
Crystal Meth;
- Likes to break
down and cry for no reason;
- Has a tattoo of
a bull’s-eye on her bum;
- She has 4 kids
from 4 different fathers;
- Answers “pretty”
to a Rorschach tests;
- Doesn’t own any
Beatle albums, tapes or CDs;
- Wears her shoes
and socks in the shower;
- Has a sign over
her toilet paper roll that says: “Save a Tree - use both sides”
;
- Video tapes
herself having seizures to sell on E-Bay;
- She’s into dead
things;
- She's the girl in the picture.
I don’t have a “10
Signs You’re Not Dating The Right Guy” because I never dated a guy,
and chances are, probably never will. But for all you girls out
there, a good rule of thumb (and this is thanks to Dave Barry) is to
watch how the guy treats a waitress.
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